‘Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.’
Buddha

When in a relationship, dating or crushing it is easy for us to question who is the ex?! We want to know; Why did they break up? Who are they? What do they look like? Do I look like them? Do I act like them? Are they still in contact? Do they still have feelings for each other? It’s easy to get caught up in the ex files and instantly feel insecure who ever their ex might be and who ever you are.

If you turn to ask yourself those same questions about your ex or past flings, you have the answers for them. Your partner will have the same about their ex too.

They aren’t together for a reason, however unless you want to be with a cold hearted person, we need to be understanding towards feelings they may bring forward with them from their past. Whether this might be guilt, insecurity or purely respect that they had for someone who was a huge part of their life.

Do not allow this element to consume your relationship or dating life, it will eat away and ruin what you have or where your journey might be heading.

My perspective is if they are friends, this is because both parties have been mature and respectful towards each other. Which is exactly how we would want to be treated in a break up, and radiates characteristics that we would want in a partner.

We must look at the positives from something we may originally of looked at as a negative. Bitterness and jealousy can destroy the strongest of relationships or connections.

‘Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.’ Mother Theresa